Radical Acceptance

Text: Matthew 6:25-27 Do not worry about your life, what you will lead or what you will drink. This sermon is the first in a number which I will preach on psychological principles and how they might apply to our spiritual growth. In each I will follow the same outline: the principle, how it works, how it is applied in psychological practice and a possible application to spiritual growth. Very practical – hopefully.

Principle:

Too much in life simply happens. We are reminded of our mortality, loved ones die, the bad news of a medical diagnosis, economic conditions change and interest rates go up. We are reminded once again that most things are beyond our control.

How do we respond? Radical acceptance is an emotional decision ‘I will accept this inescapable reality’. Or a line I read in a novel recently “the world never turned out the way you wanted it to. It simply turned. And you hung on.” (Still Life)

Radical acceptance is about accepting what is outside of your control. There is no judgment. This breaks the link of attachment to the pain. For example, grief is felt, fully, but the link to needless suffering is broken. This means watching your thoughts and feelings to identify when you are allowing yourself to feel worse than absolutely necessary.

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Rembrandt did over 40 self-portraits. In 1629, early in his career, the young artist painted himself with plumed beret, cocky, as if he knew he was about to conquer the world with his talent. Decades later, in 1669, Rembrandt approached the end of his life. In one of his last self-portraits, we see the artist with a face battered and etched by the years, a history of losses painfully evident. The rash confidence is long gone, perhaps replaced by wisdom and spiritual insight. The artist portrayed an integrated story of his life.

The self is made up of many stories. I will sketch some for you to think about in terms of your life and what makes your identity.

• The Lazy story this is life lived but not thought about. Maybe others are blamed and the self ‘excused’ but there is little depth or insight.
• The Trauma story is a scar, possibly a story that will ‘not turn off’. Think about the war veteran or survivor of DV who is plagued by nightmares.
• The Avoided story is what we refuse to see and tell. It is frozen, but has a lasting influence as it were ‘murmuring in the background.’
•  The Strong story in which we have faced daunting challenges but overcome and gained confidence in ourselves.
• The Messy story when we can find no explanation for senseless suffering. Perhaps the loss of a child. John and Ruth Harvey, only daughter went as a missionary to Africa, died in her 30’s of a hidden melanoma.
• Subversive story which undermines all other stories, perhaps even the God story.
• The Problem story in which all attention is taken up by a seemingly impossible problem.
• The Loss story is one of enduring grief.
• The Dark story from our shadow side of self.

What stories best capture aspects of your life story? Discuss for five minutes.

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“The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing.”

—Blaise Pascal (1623–1662)

In my last sermon I proposed that our identity is made up of the stories we tell about ourselves. Think of a tapestry which is made up of various threads. So too our narrative self is made up of many stories. When these stories come together in an integrated way, they can form a complete picture. This can be thought of as a deep story and with an element of transcendence a God story.

We can think for a moment about the story of the Jewish people. Their father figure was Abraham, but they became a people through the remarkable escape from slavery, which we call the Exodus, which led to wandering in the wilderness for 40 years and entering the Promised Land. All this was formative of the Jewish identity which is lasted through the 3000+ years since (and countless times of persecution). And all this was fundamental to the identity of Jesus Christ as a Jew and our developing of the Christian God story.

What are some of the potential stories? The first I will call the hidden story.

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I get at least three scam calls or texts a week. Who gets that many or even more? What I find surprising is the endless creativity, for example the recent my.gov angle. Also, just how many people are involved trying to steal my money! World crime has been estimated to generate $2T per year with counterfeiting ‘most profitable’. Illegal drugs are next. How do we make sense of this? And come to terms with international aggression such as the Russian invasion of Ukraine. Or senseless acts of terrorism and gun violence?

In our world the generous and good co-exist with evil. It has always been this way.

Some have argued that evil used to be easily identifiable, now, it has “gone underground.” Modern cultural critics blame deviant behaviour on “social forces” or “family dynamics.” Ultimately, the problem is, we have lost both the language and the ability to identify evil for what it is, and its ultimate source.

Today we look at how the early church understood the problem of evil.

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