Message – Sunday 4th September – JJ Hamilton

I picked today’s readings, slightly different from the lectionary, because I decided that I wanted to talk about creation on the first Sunday of spring, and I wanted to talk about joy and community on the week before our congregational meeting.

I had Narelle and Sumira read the whole of genesis one, despite the fact that I am sure you know genesis one, because it is a narrative, because there’s poetry in the repetition, and I wanted us to sink into that.

But really, all I have today today hinges on 1:27. We read the CEV for english translations in this community, but the version I grew up with was NIV: ‘So God created mankind in his own image’.

The first thing we are going to pull from that is, of course, that God is a creator.

For some people that seems to first and foremost mean that God’s in charge. A sort of CEO mentality – if you make it you own it. And there’s plenty biblical about a narrative of God’s power, but today I want to talk about God’s artistry. Psalm 19 – the heavens declare the glory of God.

Nature is the classic vessel for feeling that God is awe-some. Many people go big to see the majesty of creation – think of the solar system or the universe. Of stars with vast impenetrable distance between them. The expanse of creation.

I get the most majesty out of going small. I studied genetics, and for me the awe in creation is in how much bigger it is on the inside. Sometimes I sit, and do an activity I think of as “going smaller”. I’d love you to do it with me. For this, we close our eyes. Preferably we are sitting outside, but we can use our imaginations here and conjure up a blade of grass. We picture it – the grain of lines going up and down the blade. Think of the tiny hairs. And then I zoom in. What this looks like for you will depend on your biology background, but for me it means seeing the tiny pores that the blade breathes through. Then going smaller to see the cells that make up those stomata, seeing their green chloroplasts, their nucleus, seeing the moving parts. Going smaller means seeing the strands of DNA, and the enzymes that transcribe them, and those that translate their instructions. It means watching the molecules join. And I like to hold these ideas in my head as I zoom back out so see me sitting on the lawn, peacefully surrounded by the frantic activity of life.

Imagining a God who *click* pulls a rabbit out of a hat, *click* brings more than three hundred and sixty thousand species of beetles into existence, is certainly imagining a God with a kind of power. But I personally get a lot more majesty out of seeing DNA replication as the brushstrokes of creation.

And sometimes when people talk about God and creation, they tie the awesome-ness to mystery. Not knowing why zebras have stripes, or bees smell like lolly bananas when they’re angry, is a key part of being impressed by creation. The idea that creation is majestic because only God can understand it, and that it is impressive because only God can do it.

I personally think that it is perfectly likely that someday someone will understand all the parts of biology that are currently a mystery. And gain the power to make things that I certainly can’t. But I don’t think that that would take away from God. And I don’t think it would be laughing at God to say “look, I can do what you can do!” I think that that enthusiasm would be shared. That God is laughing with us when we discover something new. 

Which leads to the second take-away from Genesis 1:27. That we are creators.

If a creator God made us in their image, how can we claim they don’t want us to make? I believe in a God who created us to be creative.

There is a tweet that I love that goes like this: “God blessed me by making me transexual for the same reason he made wheat but not bread, and fruit but not wine: because he wants humanity to share in the act of creation.” I don’t know whether you will also like that line, or if you are going to want to take some time to consider it and maybe decide that you don’t. But I love the narrative of a God who wants us to make, to bake bread and to build ourselves.

The author of that tweet wrote a book, in which this concept became a poem about a robot. The book is called “everyone on the moon is essential personnel” and they have it in the ACT library system because I requested it. And the poem version goes on to talk about how not only are we created by God and by ourselves, we are created by each other.

And I think that this is also a fundamental part of Genesis 1:27 – connection. A creator God did not create a painting. Did not stop on the 4th day. God created a world that talks back. And depending on how you frame your biblical narrative, sometimes the Good News is simply that God wants connection. company. Camaraderie. I know personally that that’s my favorite part of trinitarian theology. That God is fundamentally communal.

Some of us read Rachel Held Evans’ “Inspired” a couple of years ago, as a community within this church. Rachel has much to say about the bible and our individual and collective relationships to it, which I won’t spend time on today, except to say that she has a fantastic personal tone to her writing and nothing but reading or hearing it will do her justice.

But in this book she goes through the bible in some themes. And we would be interested here in the chapter on Origin Stories. So let me read you this section, where she says it is a misunderstanding to assume that the origin stories of the Bible have to be hard, literal, facts.

There’s a curious but popular notion circulating around the church these days that says God would never stoop to using ancient genre categories to communicate. Speaking to ancient people using their own language, literary structures, and cosmological assumptions would be beneath God, it is said, for only our modern categories of science and history can convey the truth in any meaningful way.

In addition to once again prioritizing modern, Western concerns, this notion overlooks one of the most central themes of Scripture itself: God stoops. From walking with Adam and Eve through the garden of Eden, to traveling with the liberated Hebrew slaves in a pillar of cloud and fire, to slipping into flesh and eating, laughing, suffering, healing, weeping, and dying among us as part of humanity, the God of Scripture stoops and stoops and stoops and stoops.

At the heart of the gospel message is the story of a God who stoops to the point of death on a cross. Dignified or not, believable or not, ours is a God perpetually on bended knee, doing everything it takes to convince stubborn and petulant children that they are seen and loved. It is no more beneath God to speak to us using poetry, proverb, letters, and legend than it is for a mother to read storybooks to her daughter at bedtime. This is who God is. This is what God does.

And so we have a creator god, and creating humanity, a communal god, and so lastly a communal humanity. Thinking of our role in creation in this way, as some kind of artists collective makes me want to make things. Not proper art. Not necessarily anything I’m good at. It makes me want to get out the chalk and make the driveway light up with colours. It makes me want to poke at clay. It makes me want to build, to cook, dye fabric. It makes me feel that maybe I shouldn’t be in this room, but with the kids in Oasis, where whatever is going on sometimes ends in pencils covered in glue. To create with children so that I can create in a space of joy and sharing. Earnestly, humiliatingly, joyful creation.

I am lucky to have seen enough good parenting to be excited by the idea of God the parent sticking our art on the fridge. Of the divinity in lying on my belly with children, drawing together, and talking about what we have drawn. But I am the three year old, amused by the absurdity that an adult would colour the sky green. And God is the adult, infused with so much love for these children. Awash in it.

I believe in a God who is excited to be introduced to my plants, to the things I have raised with my hands. To coo over my newly darned socks. To have a taste of my dinner and have opinions on spice balances.

I believe in a God who is excited to show me a sunset. A moorhen. A cotyledon. A God who giggles to tell me how much can be made from atoms. Who is proud of all the stupid biological processes of NAD+s and FADS and regulatory pathways that were the dryest part of my degree. The same way my nanna was when she built a 3D puzzle of the Whitehouse. “Look at how much detail there is! Look at how everything fits together!”

How neat, how beautiful, to be made in the image of one who made us. A communal God building company. And how neat it is to be built to want company back. To all keep each other company in this circling comforting symbiosis.

And to consider for a second if God is simply created by us, if we imagined God in Our image, then how beautiful to define a god by creating and commune. To class as our defining traits, as our divine traits: creativity and connection. How beautiful to believe that that is what makes humans valuable.

I first and foremost want to pin my religion on a God who wants to be a part of it all. A God who is right there, feeling things, giggling at humanity’s Jello Salad stage – not in judgment but in joy. Joy at the absurdity, at the creativity. The joyful act of creation.

If you remember my first sermon I asked you to stand and make silly noises with me, because I believe that our pride and fear of foolishness is a barrier to connecting with each other. Today I do not have a silly game for you. But the call is fundamentally the same – to joyfully create bad art with other people. That is the community I believe God created us for. Thank you.

Apparently, there are 413 commandments in the Bible. Why so many? [you might ask] Well, there has to be at least one we can keep!

But there are some commonly assumed commandments that are not there. “Thou shalt not be angry” is not one of the 10 commandments (just do not take God’s name in vain). Nor is “Thou shalt not have conflict” (but try not to kill your neighbour).

Conflict is perfectly natural. As human beings we don’t always agree and, of course, some things matter and cannot be ignored. 

1. Conflict in the Early Church

There are lots of examples of leadership problems and conflict in the Bible. I will briefly look at the Book of Acts, which is Luke’s account of the first years of the Christian church. It is totally realistic about issues faced. Paul and Barnabas disagreed about whether John Mark should accompany them on a missionary journey (Acts 15:36-41). Paul was reluctant because he felt let down when John Mark left them in Pamphylia. Luke observed, “The disagreement became so sharp that they parted company.” (v39). Indeed, Paul chose Silas as his companion. Barnabas went to Cyprus with John Mark. It is clear in Paul’s letters that he had later reconciled with John Mark, but clearly this is an example of unresolved conflict on a missionary journey. Both Paul and Barnabas were in ministry with the common purpose of sharing the good news of Christ, Paul was an apostle, and presumably both had the Holy Spirit – but they disagreed and at that time the issue was left unresolved.

The early church faced a number of problems. There was a cultural division between Jews and Gentiles. Some preachers demanded that early Gentile converts be circumcised when they became believers. In effect, to become Jewish as well as Christian. Their message was “Unless you are circumcised according to the custom of Moses, you cannot be saved.” (Acts 15:1) This was a potentially explosive issue, especially when Gentile believers were flooding into the early church. Paul and Barnabas debated with them and they decided to go to Jerusalem to seek advice from the apostles and the elders. Luke gives the account, “The apostles and the elders came together to consider the matter. After there had been much debate, Peter stood up and said to them, “My brothers, you know that in the early days God made a choice among you and that I should be one through whom the Gentiles would hear the message of the good news to become believers. And God who knows the human heart, testified to them by giving them the Holy Spirit, just as he did to us and enclosing their hearts by faith is made no distinction between them and us. Now therefore why are you putting God to the test by placing on the necks of the disciples a burden that neither our ancestors nor we have been able to bear?” (Acts 15:6-10) James also spoke. After much discussion the apostles and the elders, with the consent of the whole church, decided not to require circumcision from the Gentile believers.

Now what has been called the Jerusalem Council has implications for the structure of church leadership. However, it is slightly ambiguous. I can assure you that Roman Catholics and Anglicans find a precedent for the eventual roles of bishops and priests, the Uniting Church can see an early assembly or synod, and Baptists argue for an early congregational meeting. It is important to note that the issue was faced, allowance was made for disagreement and there was a genuine attempt to seek God for an eventual resolution.

• General Principles of Conflict

We can always expect conflict in the life of the church. If there is no disagreement, then it is likely that NOTHING of importance is being done. So, it is natural to disagree. Issues will change with time, but a tendency to have different perspectives will remain.

The issue is not to avoid conflict but to deal with it in a healthy way. For nearly 25 years in my work as a clinical psychologist I specialised in helping couples in distress. The most influential researcher in this field is Dr John Gottman. He did a longitudinal study of couples and it led to a number of surprises that changed couple therapy. He found that healthy couples, who rated their marriage as satisfying, still had what could be described as intense conflict. And most of their conflict remained unresolved. The couples kept fighting over the same issues year after year. When I realised this, I stopped trying to fix issues, instead I tried to help couples find better processes. Indeed, Gottman found that what was most important was how a couple delt with being ‘gridlocked’ or stuck in conflict (important because about 2/3rds of issues never resolve in a satisfactory way). All this equally applies to family and intergenerational conflict.

Reflect: In your close family or intimate relationship, what are the issues you face? Are you any closer to a resolution after years or even decades of disagreement?

Gottman identified the four horses of the Apocalypse as destructive processes in conflict and highly predictive of eventual separation and divorce. This included criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling.

I will highlight just two: stonewallingis cutting off all communication with a barrier of silence. Contempt is personal and it is a high ground moral judgement on the other person, saying “I am superior and you are worthless.” It is important to avoid personalising conflict, but to try to honestly face the issues and to accept that sometimes convictions will remain unchanged. Hopefully, like in a good marriage we can still get on with each other.

• Application to GUC

The GUC community here has been through a difficult period. People were divided in their reaction to the ministry of Pastor Darren. Not everyone, had strong feelings about this but the leadership of the church were deeply involved in trying to work out the best way forward. There was a consultation and eventually it was determined that Pastor Darren did not have a continuing ‘vitality of call’ and he left in January 2022. There was a recent congregational survey as part of the Life and Witness Program of presbytery and there was some indication of unresolved feelings.

Rev Elizabeth Raine has challenged GUC leadership including Council to address this in a healthy way. I have proposed a three-step process which begins with this sermon.

What is the problem? I can almost hear this being asked by some with the rationale that Pastor Darren has left, so what needs to be resolved?

I would observe that the GUC went through a trauma. I am not blaming Darren for this, ministry is challenging and it is impossible for any style of spiritual leadership to be appreciated by all in a given church. But many in this church have been saddened to find a deterioration in relationships. A number of people left and will not return. For some there is an ‘open wound’. It is inevitable that such pain, left unhealed, will be triggered in the future. To use a psychological diagnosis it is the basis for a disorder such as PTSD when a battle veteran keeps reacting to any reminders of say being in Afghanistan.

The following is a model for levels of conflict. Think for a moment about what level of conflict you were engaged in, especially if you’re a leadership, or thought about the possibility of leaving this church or acted on it!

The benefit of this model is that it has a zero level of conflict in which has the appearance of conflict being fully resolved but it lies dormant and waits for someone to “poke the bear” (Elizabeth Raine). I am not a prophet but I will make a safe prediction. If we fail to address this issue, then you will call the new minister in placement and sometime in the first 6 to 12 months an issue will arise, and suddenly there will be intense emotional reactions out of all proportion to the issue at hand. You will need to be able to see, hopefully with a moment of clarity, that it is not an issue ‘caused’ by the new minister but a legacy of a previous trauma.

The second step is to take 30 minutes or so, at a time that is convenient to you, and fill out a reflection. This is a handout which I have put together and uses some of the resources of Elizabeth Raine. Hopefully you can use it to think about some of your emotional reactions. I think it will be useful and hopefully will help you to recognise when you are being triggered in the future.

The third step? This will be revealed to those who have completed the second step. So wait and see …

A Story of Reconciliation

Internationally, the best-known building in Australia is the Sydney Opera House. There is quite a background story. When the New South Wales government announced a competition for the design of the opera house 233 entries were submitted. One was by a little-known 38-year-old architect from Denmark Jorn Utzon. He proposed a striking design for the head-land at Bennelong Point. What do you ‘see’? Sails or shells or the wings of seagulls? One of the competition judges described his entry as a work of genius.

Utzon would often say that everything about the opera house was to be on the edge of the possible so this creation would be a place of human delight. Unfortunately, Utzon and the Opera house management fell into a serious rupture. Instead of being the making of this young architect the project nearly ruined him. The assignment was ambitious and it was a vision that many did not understand. The New South Wales government had issues with deadlines and overblown expenses. They forced Utzon to leave Australia when the project was only two thirds finished. The final stages of construction were completed with little regard to the original design. Utzon faded into the background. In the following years he worked on very few projects and spent many years in silence. When the opera house was finally opened by Queen Elizabeth in 1973 Utzon did not attend.

Happily, the story does not end there. 30 years later, after decades of silence between Utzon and the Opera House Trust, the trust renewed communication with Utzon and asked him to prepare a set of design principles so that future stewards of the building would know his original intentions. Utzon agreed. Then in 2004 a small extension was added to the building and a sign was attached:

Western Colonnade Project Architect Jorn Utzon.

Utzon was 87 years of age at that time. And when the new Colonnade was opened by Queen Elizabeth in 2006 he couldn’t travel. So he sent his son, Jan Utzon. The Sydney morning Herald article remarked “Rifts between architects and their clients are commonplace, reconciliations are rare.” Peter Walker (principal of UTC) observed about this story, “The story of an architect of a troubled masterpiece on Sydney Harbour and over which he lost control. He did not think stop thinking about it even for a single day. But the architect was eventually returned to his rightful place and his son marked his presence at the time of reconciliation.” God, too, provided his Son to mark his presence at the time of our reconciliation.

I would also note that on the other side of conflict a beautiful building can be found on Sydney harbour.

I would encourage everyone who was affected by the conflict to proceed to Stage 2 and to find 30 minutes to fill out the reflection. And then later find 15 minutes to complete Stage 3.

Rev Dr Bruce A Stevens is a clinical and forensic psychologist. He is a supply minister at GUC.

Thought Experiment: You have forgotten your car keys and have to return to your house.  What would you would say to yourself. Hear the words, notice the tone. Were you kind or gentle on yourself? This will indicate whether you need to listen carefully to this sermon and perhaps download the workshop notes from GUC website to do some work on your self-care.

There is a story about a Tibetan monk who was held in jail for years by Chinese prison guards.  Later he was released and had an audience with the Dalai Lama.  He was asked about his time in prison and the monk said he faced danger a few times.  The Dalai Lama asked “What danger?” The monk replied, “Of losing compassion towards the Chinese.” We have a problem in that it is often hard for us to be compassionate to ourselves!

God as Compassionate

God is portrayed as compassionate in the Old Testament (eg., Daniel 9: 9) and in the New Testament the example of Jesus is central.  Believers are encouraged to put on or to wear “compassion” (Col. 3: 12). This is seen as an attribute of God and a virtue in those who follow Christ.  Mostly compassion is expressed to those in need.

But here is a problem. It is OK to be compassionate to others but seems self-indulgent to be compassionate to oneself. Christians are vulnerable. I think we are one of last communities to be guilt sensitive – so we tend to be harder on ourselves than almost anyone else. Think about the car key example: would you use the same words to describe a loved one or a friend?

Self-Esteem?

We often think about the relationship to ourselves in terms of self-esteem.  But this is problematic (Marshall, et al., 2015).  And ultimately it must fail because it puts us on a treadmill of ‘one success after another’.  Do I need to be better-than-average to feel good about myself?  Can we all be better than average – in everything? I am without musical or athletic ability but does this ‘limit’ my self-esteem?  This has been called the ‘self-esteem trap’. 

When I was training to be a psychologist, I remember the ‘feel good’ advice to write something good about ourselves, stick it to the bathroom mirror and daily remind ourselves that we really are an ‘exceptional person’.  Or beautiful, or intelligent, or special.  Did it work? Not in my experience, it feels like self-flattery which is never convincing.

We need a better basis than contingent self-esteem to relate in a healthy way to ourselves.  Can our kindness extend to ourselves when we are disappointed, feel a failure, or rejected and hurting?  Instead, we can learn to be self-compassionate: To recognize that we are hurting.  Then to hold ourselves kindly and gently (Harris, 2011b). And if we are left with profound regrets about instances of bad behavior, can we forgive ourselves? (Rangganadhan & Todorov, 2010). This leads us to the point of self-compassion – it works best when we fail!

Mindful Self-Compassion

Mindfulness is ‘in’. It is simply paying attention, internally or externally, in an accepting way. It is characterized by attention with a gentle curiosity. This has influenced the ‘3^rd wave’ cognitive behavioural therapies which include Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Mindfulness Based Cognitive Therapy, Dialectical Behavioural Therapy and Compassion Focused Therapy.  All share a focus on relieving psychological distress through changing the person’s relationship to their problems. These two streams flow together in Mindfulness based Self-compassion. 

Mindful Self-compassion is a relatively recent addition.  One of the leading researchers is Kristen Neff (and I recommend her YouTube videos).

She has articulated three principles of Self-compassion.  You might consider them three portals or door-ways to being more self-compassionate:

• Self-kindness versus self-judgment SC encourages you to relate to yourself with kindness and understanding not harsh judgment. Sometimes it seems natural to be ‘tough’ on ourselves. We justify this with words like being ‘realistic’ or keeping our standards high. But I think it’s like punching yourself with the goal of making yourself stronger. Remember the movie Fight Club (1999) when the realization eventually comes that people are hitting themselves and not an opponent. 

When we are self-critical it leads to psychological bruises, at the least, and probably depression, at worst to self-destructive urges. The person we most often injure through self-criticism is ourselves!

The first skill is to notice automatic self-talk. A thought diary can help. Once we notice we can also see how bruising it is to talk to ourselves that way

• Feelings of common humanity versus isolation.  Do you expect yourself to be perfect? If you were to be perfect you would be a member of a very select group! (for Christians only Jesus would qualify). This is isolating. The alternative is to see your failures as part of a universal human experience. To be human is to err, well, to be imperfect. Understanding this can help us to feel connected to imperfect humanity.  Christians might think of the Biblical “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3: 23).  Eastern religions recognize being finite or limited – but again being human.   This is our common ground.

To Do: Can you say to yourself (with conviction): I am human. I make mistakes. It is natural for me to fall short of what I expect of myself. (How does that feel?)

This can lead to a dramatic shift in how we evaluate and speak to ourselves. It is an important step towards self-compassion.

To Do: Can you visualize yourself as a drop in the ‘great sea’ of humanity? Or you are one grain of sand on the beach. Try whichever appeals to you.

• Mindfulness versus over identification. There has been a mindfulness revolution in mental health circles.  Mindfulness involves being aware of the present moment.  Mindfulness is also self-accepting.  This encourages us to change our relationship to negative thoughts (which are associated with low moods). Symptoms are secondary; acceptance comes first.

A thought is just a thought. Self-compassion encourages the balance of holding painful thoughts and feelings in mindful awareness, rather than avoiding or being overly fused with them (Neff, et al., 2007). 

Try saying something like: soften, soothe, allow.

The first response from self-compassion is to recognize that we are hurting and respond with care-of-self. This might be as simple as acknowledging that we feel an uncomfortable emotion, say frustration in a situation and then acknowledging that it is normal to feel that way.  It is not the stoicism of ‘grin and bear it’, it is active in offering soothing and comfort to the self (Neff, 2011).

Personal reflection: I had to practice self-compassion when one of my ex-patients committed a murder. I had seen this man a number of years before but in a fit of rage he killed his wife. Obviously, I didn’t cure him of any homicidal tendencies. I had to say to myself, in a soft compassionate way: “I am not a perfect psychologist. I make mistakes, but I am a ‘good enough’ psychologist and I’ve helped many people.” Note that both observations are realistic.

Theological Perspective

Self-compassion is rich for both spirituality and more specifically Christian theology.  While there are theologies of self-abasement, arguing for humility before a harsh cosmic Judge (we called this worm theology at college), this view of God is a distortion and does little justice to a profound theological reflection over the centuries.  There are many theological themes relevant to a more positive attitude to ourselves: Created in the image of God (Gen 1:26), salvation history including Israel chosen by God (“Let my people go” Exodus 5:1), and the redemptive love of Christ (John 3:16).  And this is simply three dishes of a smorgasbord truths to support Self-compassion from a theological perspective.

Ultimately any theology of Self-compassion will rest on a theology of how God sees us. Does God love us? This seems easy to assert.  But does God like us?  Are we likeable? This implies ‘as we are’ which I think is more theologically confronting.  So I turn to one attempt to articulate a sense of being liked by God.  James Alison is an influential theologian who has written On being liked (2003).  He is an openly gay Roman Catholic priest.  As might be imagined him admitting this in a largely conservative church, would draw adverse comment.  Indeed, he was expelled from his religious order.   He wrote, “God likes us. All of us. God likes me and I like being liked. It has nothing to do with whether we are good or bad, indeed, he takes it for granted that we are all more or less caught up in the sacred lie” (Alison, 2003, p. 15).  We have our categories, which we find hard to look beyond, but God’s category for us is created. And at the very least this means we are worthwhile to God.  

The word love can be over-used.  In Christian circles, according to Alison, it carries the sense of being forcefully rescued. But behind the word liked is an astonishing gentleness.  This can lead to self-compassion.  Alison also got to point of recognizing that he was emotionally bankrupt. He described going from England to Brazil, for graduate studies, but also to minister to those dying of AIDS.  Here he came to a realization “what was missing was the ability to like anyone. Either them, or myself.” (p. 67) Through a series of steps Alison discovered a capacity to be liked and to like.  In this inherent reciprocity, “There is something deeply non-moralistic about this, because it means that we find ourselves learning to receive the other as a gift.” (pp. 75-76).

Ultimately Self-compassion is about seeing ourselves ‘through God’s eyes’ – the Creator who likes what he made. As infants, when first born, we can only see ourselves through the responsiveness of a parent or care-giver. This has been called ‘the looking glass self’ (Winnicott, 1971).  If this is true about our parents, it is surely equally true about God.

Conclusion

There is a rich tapestry in self-compassion.  The threads of truth are woven together: the importance of self-care extending to ourselves, the nature of our common humanity, of the healing potential of mindfulness, of the devastation of harsh self-criticism, of this pathway to enhancing care of others, and of the spiritual or theological implications.  The challenge is to limit your Inner-critic and to strengthen your Inner-soother! (Neff, 2011a). 

Rev’d Dr Bruce Stevens is a clinical and forensic psychologist. He is the supply minister at GUC.

To Do: Self-compassion Scale go to (Self-Compassion)  Best to do it online as this is auto-scored and rated.

3 GUC August 2022

Sometimes terrible things happen. Russia invades Ukraine. Employment is lost.  A medical diagnosis. The Bible is realistic and acknowledges this sad reality. Ecclesiastes “The days of trouble come, and the years draw near when you will say, ‘I have no pleasure in them’.” (12:1).

If somethings are beyond our control, what can we do? The Bible is clear that we can try to have a healthy attitude. Jesus on the Sermon on the Mount, “Do not worry about your life, or what you will eat or drink… is not life more than food and the body more than clothing?… and can anyone by worrying add more than a single hour to your span of life?” and a little later, “So do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring worries of its own. Today’s trouble is enough for today.” (Matt 6: 25-28, 34).

Disappointments, losses and tragedies will challenge our faith. In this message I would like to look at two healthy responses. This is the third in series of sermons on mental health.

1. Acceptance

Jesus accepted that ‘bad things happen to good people’. Some events are random. Sometimes people make bad choices, such as drinking too much and driving, with consequences for the innocent. There are no guarantees of a ‘charmed life’ for his followers. If anything Jesus predicted persecution and costly discipleship. The only potential reward was promised in the after-life (which may reassure some believers but not all).

But there is a principle of living: in his teachings: Accept what comes and allow your values to guide you.

Richard Holloway has had a successful career in the church: famous preacher, writer and bishop of Edinburgh. In his book Waiting for the Last Bus, he recalled a silly incident in his youth. In his 20’s he was losing his hair, so he bought was proved to be sugar pills to ward off baldness. The ad was in a Church magazine. Had the pills worked, “I would have missed learning one of the best lessons life teaches: that it is better to accept reality rather than to deny it.”

Acceptance is easier said than done. It is not easy when you prematurely lose your hair (ask Prince William), or are fired from a job, or have a car accident leading to a permanent disability. Or when we face a threatening medical diagnosis or suffer the death of a loved one. 

I think we have to practice  acceptance. Both words are equally important. We accept what we cannot change, but the practice of acceptance is to remind ourselves of all the good things we have enjoyed in life. It is to balance the pluses and the negatives. It is also to resist a downward spiral through endless rumination and ultimately depression. Paradoxically the practice of acceptance requires a lot of effort. It is not passive.

Dr Shane Clifton is one of Australia’s best theologians. At age 40 he had an accident which rendered him quadriplegic and dependent on a motorized wheel-chair to get around. He was teaching at Alpha Crucis College a Pentecostal Bible College. His story abounds with ironies. As a Pentecostal he had to endure countless public prayers for healing and the inevitable accusation that he lacked faith.  As a theologian he considered the accident random and attribute it, in his own memorable words, “dumb luck”.  He accepted his disability and has become a world renown disability theologian – now associated with Sydney University because he was fired from the Bible College. He supported LGBTQ rights and went in the mardi gras parade.

• Pain and Suffering

Psychologists who work with chronic pain patients often make a distinction between pain and suffering. I will use the example of ‘Mary’ who has chronic lower back pain. This was the result of a fall in a shopping centre. She had surgery but the pain persists. It is an unavoidable legacy of her injury.

There are three natural responses: (a) Mary might withdraw, avoid any activity, basically remain bed-bound. There may be some initial benefit in avoiding pain since physical activity can aggravate it, but she will require a lot of physical support, eventually exhaust her family and friends and gradually become isolated. She will become increasingly depressed. All these extra effects can be labelled suffering. Therefore, she has both physical pain and emotional suffering. (b) Mary might use substances to avoid her pain such as food, alcohol, overly rely on pain medication, or distractions such as online gambling. Again this may have some temporary benefit in masking pain but eventually the negative effects of her coping will lead to an increase in suffering. (c) Or Mary could see a pain specialist physician and psychologist. They would encourage her to increase her activity and reduce the pain medication. This would have the short-term effect of increasing her physical pain but it would potentially decrease suffering. She might conclude, “It hurts more to walk to the park with my grandchildren but being with them and enjoying their playful interaction is worth the cost.”

None of this is easy. But I believe there is a very important principle for our emotional self-care and eventual mental health.

I will now use myself as an example. I have lived my life as one of the most privileged in our society: white male, middle-class, educated, professional, affluent, heterosexual, a citizen of the first world. I am the stereotype of the oppressor for almost every disadvantaged group in society. But I consider myself blessed for no good reason.

But no matter how fortunate you are there is an age when you ‘start dogging bullets’. For me it was about age 65. I have lost friends and family members who were younger, but it seemed exceptional. 2½ years ago I was diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease, a deteriorating neurological disorder with no known cure. Today I consider myself about 3-4% disabled but with time this will certainly get worse and eventually I will need residential care (if I don’t die sooner from something more life threatening). I have the goal of living the next 10 years with some quality of life.

I find the distinction of pain and suffering enormously helpful. I have some physical pain from stiffness and occasional muscle aches, slight balance issues and annoying things like difficulty swallowing. My most obvious symptom is my left arm tremor, but that is only embarrassing. Pain at present is minimal but there is much to worry about from a shortened lifespan, to possible immobility, to dementia and even psychosis.

So I exercise, take medication, do an alternative therapy with red-light laser treatment and ‘live life to the full’. Suffering is minimal. For example, I have retired as an academic and a clinical psychologist, will retire at the end of the year as a forensic psych but want to continue in ministry which I enjoy. I used to joke that in the Uniting Church most congregations are 70-90 years old (so everyone had some disability) but then I called to GUC the youngest congregation I know of in presbytery! One of the reasons I pay bass in the band is because last year I gave it up because of the Parkinson’s. I am not a very good musician, but why give something up when you enjoy it?

Spiritual Implications

It is easy spiritualize all this: to say trust God and all will be OK. But it is rarely that simple and being a Christian is never a formula for magical protection. But most believers have some sense of God working in our lives, what has been called providence. Paul in his letter to the Romans expressed it, “We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose.” (8:28)

We can pray for a sense of God’s presence when we go through difficult circumstances and hope for a favourable outcome. We can practice acceptance for that which we cannot change. We can accept physical pain and do everything possible to minimize emotional suffering.

I would never have thought of Donald Rumsfeld as a philosopher. You might recall that he was Defence Secretary under President George Bush and practically ran the country. He said something memorable in relation to Iraq’s supposed weapons of mass destruction, “There are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns, that is to say that there are somethings we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns: the one we don’t know we don’t know.” I think that there are things we sense but cannot fully know, and spiritual reality has this quality. Perhaps we can learn to trust in ‘what we sense but cannot know fully.’

There is a final scene in movie September Gun (1983). There is an old gunfighter and his nephew. The young man says, “I can’t understand it Uncle Ben, that nun did everything wrong and yet it came out OK.” Uncle Ben said, “Just keep thinking about it Jason.”

Rev Dr Bruce Stevens is an endorsed clinical psychologist and supply minister at GUC.